*** Editor’s Note: THIS IS SATIRE, based on a recent GUSA resolution. ***
6th Year of Publication Article Number: 267
Introduced by: Students of Georgetown (With Sense), Inc. (Accepted, On Occasion),
Cosponsored by: The Office of Consideration and Deliberation of Bureaucratic Functions,
Endorsed by: The First Amendment of the United States Constitution (Added, 1791)
The Georgetown Review
In the school year 2019-2020
A RESOLUTION to THANK the Georgetown University Student Association for Wasting Everyone’s Time
WHEREAS, on July 6th, 2020, there was a GUSA meeting at 9:00 at night that went on for more than two hours,
WHEREAS, the condemnation of a Georgetown student lead to campus Republicans wrestling themselves away from counting their money to see what the wokeness hath wrought,
WHEREAS, GUSA apparently thinks that a post from a student’s private blog is the most pressing matter at hand.
THEREFORE, be it RESOLVED by The Georgetown Review as follows:
- DECLARES that GUSA be thanked for wasting everyone’s time.
Certification
We hereby certify that the foregoing legislation was duly considered by The Georgetown Review over a series of text messages and missed phone calls and that the same was approved by editorial decision and boldness in the face of the mob, this 9th day of July, 2020.
